Feeling Better

Posted on: Friday, January 30, 2009
Posted at: 5:57 AM

All them tests down. And one montage to go.

phew.

Today wasn't such a bad day at school i guess.

Besides the tests its all slacking and such. haa.

Thanks teach for the ferrero.

Anyways.

Here's some pics that i Just Gotten.

Taken quite a few days ago.

Gelare!

The cookie he got me with the meal (:

Sum seafood baked rice thingy?

hehe

Clam Chowder!

Quiche. Salmon.

Teehee.

I HAD to try his new sunglasses. XD

I know i posted this before.

But he's unresistable yes?

hehe

Loves.

SD.

Posted on: Thursday, January 29, 2009
Posted at: 4:43 AM

2 down 2 to go.

never ending workload is like killing me bit by bit.

damn.

at least the presentation is out of the way.

and the phase test.

phew.

today ain't such a bad day.

Thanks for the treat teach.

and thanks to Another teacher for the lil gift and words of wisdom.

much appreciated.

really.

moving on.

i am soooooo SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPY lah sehh!

i'm totally lacking of sleep.

damn.

Weekends to catch up.

yea rite.

I've got some serious partying to do after this whole week of tests!

City Alive here i come! (:

I think imma start counting down now.

Though tis not feb.

Its close enough!

25 days to go.

sighs.

I feel old already.

gee.

I need to form my own chocolate club.

No no.

Dessert club.

hmm.

De-stressing dessert club.

hehe.

any takers?

Aites.

I need to hit the books agn soon.

Take care all!

Loves.

SD..

Posted on: Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Posted at: 6:21 AM

A Walk A Day Keeps The Fats Away!

haha.

read it on some bilboard in woodlands.

Moving on.

Today was in a way great.

Spent time with him.

Gelare of the day! (:

Evening out to celebrate an early birthday for future sis in law.

Was not bad at all i guess.

Up next.

VBI and dad's bdae. hmm.

Anyways.

I know i've got much of an explaning to do.

Yet i shall say i can't do that now.

Not until i sort out myself and my life.

So bear with me here people.

As shocked as you all are.

I'm feeling the same way too.

Supposedly me and VBI.

Mummy. kekeke

Sugar overload.

I mean it!

mummy's bdae cake.

Posted on: Thursday, January 22, 2009
Posted at: 5:49 AM

3 days off from school.

yet i'll be back tomorrow.

As much as i love not being in sch.

I hate the fact that i am sick.

Shivered like hell the night before.

I sorta miss sch now.

Glad i'd be back tmr.

And glad that we gt half day!

yessa!

Mum's bdae today.

Celebrated as always.

Only this time we have uncle Zul to join us.

Man he's heck of a fellow.

Daring and loud.

Wonder why he hasnt been married till now.

hmm...

Anyways,

it was fun.

What with a celebration like that.

Crazy and fun company.

Plus me being distracted by GUITAR HERO!

wohoooo!

Niways.

Off to bed with me.

See ya'll soon.

Take care.

Loves.

Posted on: Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Posted at: 6:26 AM

I guess second chances are meant to be given.

And good will you get in return.

My sick day today.

And i was REALLY sick.

Flu, sore throat, cough, fever.

The whole package.

I'm still not liking that new doc.

*recites profanitites under breath*

I am sooo hooked to guitar hero lah!

Its so fun even VBI's playing it.

*He was grumbling abt it at the beginning!*

Anyways.

I MASTERED IT ALREADY!

Don't mean to brag but i have by far achieve the highest scores for all.

I BEAT MY BROTHER!

WOHOO!

*maybe cause i stayed till 1.30am to just beat his d**ned score. hehe*

Oh yes.

I got a new dress.

New shoes.

New bag.

New jacket.

New carrier.

Ok so its all new.

And its all free.

And i have only one person to thank.

And its... (:

Thanks for spoiling me to the core my dear.

Aite im off to eat med.

Go to bed.

Rest.

And b ready for sch tmr.

Take care all.

Loves.

Posted on: Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Posted at: 8:38 AM

MAGGOT BUSTERS!

**This story is solely between us small bunch. (: **

GUITAR HERO lahh seyy!

Hooked. Addicted. Fun lahh! XD

My New Teddy!

Cute rite? (:

Another addition to SD's mini banners. (:

TCC HEAVEN!

Thanks sweetie!

p.s: Hudz. This is THE dessert i wanted to treat you ppl to! (:

All in all.

THE BEST DAY EVER!

Good company.

Good food.

Great pick-me-ups.

and guitar hero.

What more could a girl ask for?

*ok dun ans that qn! keke*

Take care.

Loves.

Posted on: Monday, January 19, 2009
Posted at: 8:06 AM

Does this makes sense at all?

Hmm..

~ She sinks in deep down into her seat.

Reminiscing.

Thinking of what once was.

The hole left gaping.

The pain too much to bear.

Eyes shut. Tears flowing.

She suffers alone in despair.

Another chapter closes in her life.

Soon her book will end.

So long and farewell.

This she bids to her once lover turned friend. ~

Its you SF. (:

no worries. you will long be forgotten.

sorry and goodbye.

Posted on:
Posted at: 7:01 AM

Move it. Move on. Stay away. Please be gone.

This is doing us both a favour. You know who you are. Please understand. Thanks.

Posted on:
Posted at: 6:36 AM

The Imperfectionist.

Its been a not so bad weekend i suppose?

I suppose only lah.

Monday.

Today.

Doesn't make much of a difference though when im at school.

hmm.

Niways.

I had a great time today in the evening that is.

Got to spend the time with Kak Aidah and her husband.

I guess i could say relating with them is easier than with my own brothers.

Maybe cause they led somewhat the same life as me?

God knows.

Ok so yea.

Dinner.

Movies.

And a ride back home.

Not bad at all.

Only thing i ain't looking fwd to now is...

SCHOOL!

bloody hell.

Done.

Did.

Over.

Ciao

Take care all.

Love.s

Posted on: Sunday, January 18, 2009
Posted at: 7:22 AM

Pictures that are long due.

So i compiled and here i am to update. (:

Mum's boss gave these to us.

They're like the best. And is from Japan.

We finished it in 2 days?

hee. XD

Things me and nephew do when we're bored of studying!

Museum of Broken Relationships

**I find the exhibits very interesting and some amusing. But some, you'd end up feeling the pain. Here's some that moved me most. Maybe cause they relate to me one way or another.**

My gifts from a great friend. (:

Pencil Tower!

Mum used to call it that.

N i still call it that till now.

Childhood memories. (:

Posted on:
Posted at: 12:06 AM

Morning call!

For once i woke up reasonably early for my liking on a sunday morning.

Only for 2 reasons.

Meet Neko and retrieve my DVD drive.

And also to satisfy my craving for macs bfast.

I'm still in much need of sleep.

SD's forcast for the rest of the week:

Crankiness and much moodswings are expected.

Standby for thunderstorms and undefined mood changes.

Please bear with this for a week.

*heh.sorry guys*

I can't wait for bro to get home.

For once.

Cos cos.

HIS FRIEND'S BRINGING GUITAR HERO TO WORK!

MEANS I'M GETTING IT WHEN HE'S HOME!

AHHHHH!

In much of a writters block today.

So i shall update more later.

Take care all.

Loves.

ps: for what i wore yest. Ok so that was once in a lifetime okies. consider yourself lucky! for what happened yest. too bad i guess. u still owe me right? haa. Gelare and ljs yes? (:

Posted on: Saturday, January 17, 2009
Posted at: 7:40 AM

Taken by Hudzie. Edited by SD. (:

Life can be a pain in the a** at times.

But it can also be one h*ll of a bliss.

How more complicated can it be?

Very.

I've been hearing this phrase alot lately.

"It takes two hands to clap"

Yes i totally agree to it.

That's why i am in such a dilema.

Or so i was.

After what i found out today.

After hearing everything.
Revealing everything out.

I guess one obstacle down.

Another to go.

*fine sort of down*

Facing one thing at a time.

My new approach.

To find myself once more.

Gain back the composure and confidence.

Move on.

My "better outlook" on life.

I hope it works.

Cause i really need it to.

Its now or never baby!

I need to improve more.

And stay that way.

I can't go back on my words anymore.

One step at a time.

*breathe*

Trying to be as happy as i can be.

Please.

Such things can't be forced.

You're not happy with it?

Walk out and leave lah!

Oh and yes my phone will continue to be diverted or shut off periodically.

*periodically. i leant that in QCnA. hehe*

I need the peace and i need the time alone.

So please understand.

Man one of these days.

I am so going to the beach.

And applying what my friend thought me.

On how to relief some small amount of stress.

Yes.

I will.

I have to.

*breathe*

Aite.

I'm off.

Take care all.

Loves! XD

*Gelare tues anyone? haha.*

Posted on:
Posted at: 7:24 AM

Who I Am Hates Who I've Been

by Relient K

I watched the proverbial sunrise
coming up over the Pacific and
you might think I'm losing my mind,
but I will shy away from the specifics...

'cause I don't want you to know where I am
'cause then you'll see my heart
in the saddest state it's ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

[Pre-Chorus]
Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it.
See that line. Well I never should have crossed it.
Stop right there. Well I never should have said
that it's the very moment that
I wish that I could take back.

[Chorus]
I'm sorry for the person I became.
I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I'm ready to try and never become that way again
'cause who I am hates who I've been.
Who I am hates who I've been.

I talk to absolutely no one.
Couldn't keep to myself enough.
And the things bottled inside have finally begun
to create so much pressure that I’ll soon blow up.

I heard the reverberating footsteps
sinking up to the beating of my heart,
and I was positive that unless I got myself together,
I would watch me fall apart.

And I can’t let that happen again
‘cause then you’ll see my heart
in the saddest state it’s ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

[Pre-Chorus x2]
[Chorus]

Who I am hates who I've been
and who I am won’t take the second chance you gave me.
Who I am hates who I’ve been
‘cause who I’ve been only ever made me...

So sorry for the person I became.
So sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I’m ready to try and never become that way again
‘cause who I am hates who I’ve been.
Who I am hates who I’ve been.

Posted on: Monday, January 12, 2009
Posted at: 8:48 PM

I have a failing liver and an untamed heart.

Haha.
How i can only wish that was true.
The second one is true though.
Only the first part.
Maybe in future?
hmm...

Can't go home oh no.
That's where it all began.
School is like my refuge.
But when its time to go back.
I wish there was somewhere else that i can bunker to for a few days.
I can't face them anymore.
THis headache is killing me.
Literally.

Life is currently something that i wish to turn off for a few days.
If only there was such a thing.
Or at least.
I want to turn off my brain and let it rest for a bit.
Maybe that won't be such a bad thing either.
Honestly.
I havent a clue wtf im writting now.

And so here i end this post.
I will update when i can gather myself together.
Cause now.
I don't know what state of mind im in.

My insanity took over me long before i realised it.

Goodbye.

Posted on:
Posted at: 1:59 AM

Curses and Swears.

The day my laptop died on me.
Why?!
Why now?!
How could you?!
*though my pleas and cries are to no avail. dammit*

Note to all.
This blogger have gladly decided that her blog link will change very VERY soon.
Due to some issues and such.
Also in a few days or earlier.
The tagboard will be revamped.
I think might be later.
See how lazy i am lah.

Days in school.
Was a total bore w/o my devoted lil laptop.
And also im getting DjMax tmr like finally!
hehe.
Cause the gang's addicted to DTX now thanks to mua. (:

ALways looking on the bright side of life.
I guess.
Will try my best lah.
But oh wells.
Lets see when all this crushed hope will turn to something i really want.
I'm waiting for the day where my frown turns into a smile once more.

I am not feeling good now.
Urgh.
I want out lahh!!!!
:X

Meds are not the cure to what i have.
For the problem only lies within.
Its up to me if i want to be cured or not.
So pls give up trying.
Leave me alone and let me heal on my own.
All i need is purely quiet company.
Silence is the key.
The only thing i need.
Please...

Posted on: Sunday, January 11, 2009
Posted at: 5:31 AM

Once an outcast.
Always an outcast.

I'm just so frustrated.
To this fact.
People love to say.
"Be yourself" no matter what.
But they don't really mean it that way.

Its like.
To one group of people.
I have to be this calm and quiet girl.
Don't have much of a self opinion to speak out.
Just agree and make people happy.
Or you'll just be a damned outcast.

Then to another.
I have to be this person.
Who says anything and everything.
I have to talk.
Though i don't wish to.
Or else.
I'm just labeled as this "selfish bitch".
Who cares not in sharing with others.
Just keeping things to herself.

Then to another.
I have to be this prim and proper lil brat.
Stay home.
Be good.
Follow everything told.
Never fight back no matter how intense and untrue the situation is.

Then there's one more.
Who insist i change.
To be more girly.
Be softer.
In terms of movements, speech and dressing.
Be more of who i should be. (in their opinion anyways)

Urgh.
I need to stop hiding and find the real me.
Cause i no longer know who i really am now.
I give up pretending and making ppl happy just for the sake of friendship.
x_x

Lifeless. Hopeless. Loveless. Soul-less.

Give it up.
Give up giving up.
Stagnant.
Immobile.
Unthinkable.
SD

Posted on:
Posted at: 4:46 AM

Scream
Tokio Hotel

You get up
And somebody tells you
Where to go to
When you get there
Everybody's telling you
What to do
Thank you
It's been another
Bloody Monday
And noone
Is asking what you wanted
Anyway

NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN
NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN

SCREAM 'till you feel it
SCREAM 'till you believe it
SCREAM and when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
SCREAM 'till you feel it
SCREAM 'till you believe it
SCREAM and when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
Scream... (Scream it out loud)

Watch out
Stay awake
They're lurking
Obsess you
They are always
Working
Promising
Everything you
Never asked for
And one day
It'll be too late
And you'll
Beg for more

NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN
NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN

SCREAM 'till you feel it
SCREAM 'till you believe it
SCREAM and when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
SCREAM 'till you feel it
SCREAM 'till you believe it
SCREAM and when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
Scream...

Back to zero
Your time's about to come
Let them know
You're not just anyone
(Scream...)

Your time's about to come

SCREAM 'till you feel it
SCREAM 'till you believe it
SCREAM and when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
SCREAM 'till you feel it
SCREAM 'till you believe it
SCREAM and when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
Shut up!

NO 'coz you feel it
NO 'coz you believe it
NO and when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
Scream it out loud
SCREAM...!

Posted on:
Posted at: 4:39 AM

I don't care
F.O.B

Say my name, and his in the same breath,
I dare you to say they taste the same,
Let the leaves fall off in the summer
And let December glow in flames (flames)

Brace myself and let go,
Start it over again in Mexico
These friends, they don't love you
They just love the hotel suites, now

I don't care what you think
As long as it's about me
The best of us can find happiness
In misery

I don't care what you think
As long as it's about me
The best of us can find happiness
In misery

Oh, take a chance, let your body get a tolerance,
I'm not a chance, but a heat wave in your pants
Pull a breath like another cigarette,
pawn shop, I'm trading up (trading up)

I'm the oracle in my chest,
Let the guitar scream like a fascist,
Sweat it out, shut your mouth,
Free love on the streets, but
In the alley and I ain't that cheap, now

I don't care what you think,
As long as it's about me
The best of us can find happiness
In misery

I don't care what you think,
As long as it's about me
The best of us can find happiness
In misery

Said-a, I don't care just a-what you think,
As long as it's about me, you said-a
I don't care just what you think,
As long as it's about me, you said-a
I don't care (I don't care)
You said I don't care (I don't care)
Said I don't care,
I don't care
I don't care (I don't care), I said-a
I don't care

I don't care what you think,
As long as it's about me
The best of us can find happiness
In misery

I don't care what you think,
As long as it's about me
The best of us can find happiness
In misery

p.s: its to you... (:

Posted on: Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Posted at: 7:45 PM

Crash and Burn.

To be with someone.
I suppose you can say its a bliss.
But at the same time.
It can be a tragedy.
The one mistake you'd ever make.
But you're happy with it.
I don't know.
What do you think?

To have been with and lost that someone.
Oh the pain the agony.
All the melodramatics come to view.
Grievience and sap stories.
Self pity and self pathetism.
It all arrises.
hmm.

I guess sometimes.
Its just good to stay single eh.
No care in the world.
All free and easy.
DO what you want kinda life.
Well, i guess that's the life i want.

But at the same time.
I guess we all need someone to fall back on.
And its such miracle bliss when you have someone special in your life.
Who you know feels the same way about you as you about them. (or so you thought)
To have around.
I guess everyone needs someone.
Its just a matter of finding that someone.
hmm.

I so hate being a teenager.
There's so much facts and fiction about life to be figured out.
Can be damn frustrating when all your decisions lead you to the wrong way.
When all you do only brings you to a wrong turn.
When all you hope for crash and burn.
When your life is slowly but surely going down the drain.
damn.

SD shall admit that she is a self contradicting person.
Cause.
I hate being a teenager.
BUT.
Neither do i want to grow any older.
Ish.

School's boredom makes all this crap come out.
urgh.
Mushroom madness!
Mushroomers!
gawd.

Science freaks.
haaa.
XD

maybe the best thing now is for everyone to stay away from me.

~she's nothing but trouble.~

Posted on: Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Posted at: 7:33 AM

Mogu Collectors.

My 'first' day back at school.
Got up late.
Rushed.
Still arrived late.
hahas.

I'm in the fungi team.
Mogu!
ahah.
Learnt that from Jean.

Anyways.
Thanks Hudz for treating me today!
(:

Then did some mushroom thing.
CCA fair was boring.
Finally caught up with dayat agn.
The disappearing lil bro of mine.
hahas.

Then after sch went to meet cuzzie.
Dinner and hung out at suntec.
She bought herself a belt.
And i gt my new makeshift wallet.
*supposed to be a card holder. hahas*

Anyways,
its wad andrew used to have and now i have it.
yay!
hahas.

Okies.
I've nt much to update.
Sick agn as always.
No surprise there.

Take care all.

Posted on: Monday, January 5, 2009
Posted at: 4:41 AM

Home "Torturously" Sweet Home.

To have caused such trouble i am responsible for it.
I hope things work out for you guys soon.

Mishaps, troubles, pain and misery.
Bestowed upon me and those around me.
How can i not be guilty of such things.

Being misunderstood and misinterpreted was bad enough.
But to have affected those innocent ones along the way.
That was the last straw.
Maybe i was never meant to ever blog on my days after all.

With all this weighing on my shoulders.
School had to add on to it.
~~Fuck~~ you _________.
Haven't you done enough to demoralize.
Now you extort.
What kind of monsters are you?
Urgh.

Ok i dun blame them fully.
I guess i am somewhat like them.
Only in different ways.

Self inflicted pain and torture can be such great bliss in these situations.
If only i hadn't bruised myself too bad the last time. hmm.

Ahh.
Top it all off.
This headache is making me want to k--- myself!
Just mere pain is not able to counter this horrific nightmarish pain.
First out of many i have encountered.
How can this be.
Its driving me to total insanity.

Oh geez.
I sound sooo melodramatic.
But hey wads the use of the truth w/o some unbelievable drama rite?

Aite.
It ends here.
I just want to move on.
So i hope.

Take care ppl!
Loves.

Posted on: Sunday, January 4, 2009
Posted at: 2:40 AM

Second thoughts on re-privatising my blog?
DEFINITELY!

I can't stand that what i write on my posts affects others who gladly misunderstand it.
Or gets over worked about it.
i mean like seriously ppl.
Take it easy will you?!

My blog is for my freedom of speech.
For me to write what i want.
If you got a problem with it.
The ~~fuck~~ lah come talk to me can?!

If you don't ~~fucking~~ have a freakin open mind.
Then ~~fuck~~ it lah.
Go view some other blog.
Don't bother reading mine!
And if your ~~fucking~~ affected by this.
Then good.
At least you know who the ~~fuck~~ you are!
Urgh.

What i want to write here.
Is my ~~fucking~~ problem ok!
So if you have a problem with it.
DEAL WITH IT!
Cause its my blog.
For ppl who want to see, see it.
if u're gona bloody raise hell from it.
Then stay away from my blog alright!

Sheesh.

And to the rest who aren't those who did what i wrote above.
I am soo sorry you had to read this post.

p.s: tagboard will be revamped soon. Also at times this blog will be privatised for some reasons. thanks.

Posted on: Thursday, January 1, 2009
Posted at: 5:10 AM

First Day Of The New Year.

Not such a bad day.
I guess.
Maybe.
Sorta.

I love the family gathering meal.
*note: THE MEAL!*
(:

And baby Zara's growing!
So cute!
She turns people's fingers into baby stressballs.
hahas.

Long week ahead.
Lotsa catching up to do.
This and that.
Here and there.

Still with the bad headache.
It sucks.
But still.
Damn.
Its getting worse.

I need distractions.
This headache hates it.
Goes away when i have distractions.

Oh gosh.
I'm abt to...

Ciao!
X|